I'm a Girl!
by Mixelica
Summary: Sequel to Me Myself and I: The Next Generation. Randy regenerates into a full-blooded Time Lady, and helps her family and friends recapture the Master, but now that she is a time lord, where will her loyalties lie?
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1: Let's kill Stalin

Randy should never have gone to Stalinist Moscow. He could tell it was a bad idea from the beginning when he _thought _about it, but Harmony _wanted _o go, and so did he, if he didn't stop to think.

He, Harmony, Jenny, and Dean had been making casual conversation in Randy's back garden trying to think of something to do, when Harmony said "Let's kill Stalin."

"Are you mad?" asked Jenny. "Won't that change history?"

"It would change history for the better, wouldn't it?" Harmony pointed out.

"Not necessarily. I don't think you can really predict that sort of thing" Randy replied.

"Really? I can, sort of" Harmony replied. She thought for a moment, then said "I suppose you're right actually, but why not at least go to that period and see what it's like?"

"You want to see what a totalitarian dictatorship is like? Seriously?" Randy replied.

"You scared?" asked Dean.

"Of course!" Jenny said. "Aren't you?"

"Besides, how would we ever find the TARDIS to get there?" Randy asked.

"I think I can find it" Harmony said mischievously.

"You don't have a key!" Randy replied.

"We'll see if I need one..." Harmony replied mysteriously.

"Let's go then" said Dean. Jenny looked at him quizzically, but he squeezed her hand, and she relaxed. Jenny, Harmony, and Dean stood up and started walking towards Harmony's house. Not wanting to miss out on any fun, Randy went with them.

When the four of them reached Harmony's garden, Harmony walked toward a large shed and opened it. The TARDIS was inside.

"You knew it was there?" Randy asked.

"I sort of stumbled on it once" Harmony replied, not quite believably.

"I suppose your Dad is home then" said Dean.

"Must be..." Harmony replied absently. "Are we going inside or not?"

"Don't you need a key?" Randy asked.

Harmony impatiently snapped her fingers in reply, and the TARDIS door creaked open. The four of them walked inside.

"How did you do that?" Dean asked.

"Saw my Dad do it once, figured I might be able to" Harmony replied casually. She snapped her fingers again and the TARDIS door closed.

"Do you even know how to work this thing?" Randy asked.

Harmony did not reply. She was busy working the controls effortlessly, as if they were second nature to her.

"Why can't I do that?" Randy asked enviously.

"Both of my parents are connected to the TARDIS in some way. I guess I must be too"

"Your Mum too?"

"Yeah, she was conceived in it"

"That was too much information. Anyway, where are we going exactly?"

"The Kremlin, 1943. Stalin should be living there." Harmony replied. "Or at least we'll find someone important in there."

"My Dad said-"

Dean rolled his eyes in irritation.

"I _heard _that the TARDIS doesn't usually take you where you tell it to go." Jenny corrected.

"It didn't obey my Dad but it did obey my Mum, so I'm guessing it will obey me fifty percent of the time?" Harmony giggled, clearly enjoying herself. She pulled a lever. The engines started running. "There's no going back now!"

"We do intend to return, don't we?" Randy remarked dryly.

The engines stopped. Randy and Jenny looked at each other cautiously, then followed Dean and Harmony outside. They walked into what was indeed an ornate gilded palace.

"Looks like we're in the right place..." said Jenny nervously.

"You there!" a guard called.

"Huh?" Harmony looked around and saw the guards approaching. "Shit... I forgot the psychic paper." The other three looked at her in alarm.

"Wait a minute, why is he speaking-" Dean started to say.

One of the guards raised a gun.

"Run!" Jenny screamed. Harmony and Dean started running, but before Randy could move he felt himself hit with immense force and felt an agonizing pain in his chest. He fell over. Dimly he realized that he had been shot. Jenny picked him up and carried him to the others, and they continued to run until they reached the TARDIS. Harmony slammed the door shut.

"You're awfully strong..." Randy remarked lethargically.

"Oh no... Please don't die" Harmony was starting to cry. "Please... you can't..."

Randy was about as afraid of imminent death as he was able to be, but blood loss was dimming his consciousness. His mind was almost blank when suddenly he was wide awake and felt as if his bones were on fire. Dean, Harmony, and Jenny ran quickly away from him. Randy felt like he should be screaming, but no sound came out. He lost consciousness.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: I'm a girl?!

When Randy woke up, he was in his own bed, and his parents were standing over him. His mother seemed to be brushing off fresh tears. When she saw him wake up she looked relieved and said "Thank goodness you're alright!". Randy's father seemed to be trying for an angry look, but flashes of amusement kept creeping through.

"Is something funny?" Randy asked dully. He gasped slightly. His voice sounded different. It sounded _higher_.

"My voice..." his tongue met his front teeth as he spoke. "My teeth..."

Randy's eyes slid downward.

Randy put a hand to his chest. "Wha... Shit!"

Randy's father was nodding slowly.

"I'm a girl?! How can I be a girl?!" She suddenly felt a bit dizzy, as if her brain were working a million miles a minute. "But I can't regenerate! I mean, you can't regenerate so I shouldn't be able to, and-"

"That's what I thought..." Randy's father said. "I suppose I could have been wrong."

"So you can regenerate? Or is there some other reason? Or?" Randy put a hand to her head "Ow..."

_Can I?_ Randy's father communicated telepathically.

Randy nodded. Randy's father checked her heartbeat. Randy tried to check her own pulse on her throat but it sounded odd somehow"

"Two hearts..." Randy's father murmured. Rose gasped. "Rose, could you give us a minute?" Randy's father said to her.

"Right, yeah..." Rose agreed quietly and left the room.

"Two hearts... as in... full time lord?" Randy muttered disbelievingly.

"Time lady it would seem..."

"Oh. Well, that's just great. I'm a girl, and I'm an alien."

"Well you're not an alien to me."

"Right, 'cause you got the Doctor's memories... You remember being the same species... But you're not really..."

"Don't whine. You're hardly alone. The Doctor's also a time lord, all your friends are at least half time-lord..."

"One other person... And no other girls... I suppose I'll want to spend time with girls now..." Something suddenly occurred to Randy. Would she like girls or boys now? Regeneration hadn't just meant turning into a time lady, even if she hadn't turned into a girl it would still be a complete DNA overhaul. Who could say what or _who _she would like?

"How are you feeling anyway?" Randy's father asked sympathetically.

"Hungry..." Randy muttered.

"I've got just the thing!" Randy's father announced. "Come to the kitchen."

Randy looked at her clothes for the first time since she woke up. They were torn. Randy put on a robe and followed her father to the kitchen. On the table were a variety of dishes.

"I'm not that hungry... Well, actually, I'm starving, but still..."

"I don't expect you to eat it all at once. You can't expect to be sure of what you like to eat anymore. I figured I'd let you sample a variety of things so you don't end up spitting out food later."

"You're being awfully nice about this. Why am I not in trouble?"

"You've been through a lot, and what's done is done. Your gave your mother a big scare. She was terrified. But for me? Regeneration happens. If it didn't happen now, it would have happened some other time."

"Yeah... in eighty years."

"Well now that you're full time-lord you'll live a very long time." His face grew dark.

"The curse of immortality? Am I immortal?"

"Not exactly. Loomed time lords have a built-in regeneration limit. Twelve regenerations, and then that's it. The Doctor thinks he's got around that but he hasn't told me how. You weren't loomed, so you probably have far more regenerations than that. Perhaps an infinite number. But you can always refuse to regenerate if you want to."

"Choose when you want to die... that's ideal isn't it?"

"If you can bring yourself to choose death... And for me, regeneration is like a death. Like an end of consciousness as well as personality."

Randy thought for a moment. She didn't exactly feel as if she had died, but she did feel as if a part of her that used to exist was now gone, and she had felt like she was dying right before she regenerated, but she could remember her entire previous life. She wondered if she should be scared of regenerating again. She didn't want to think about it. She remembered her hunger and sat down to eat. Her tastes _had _changed, but she still felt neutral about most foods. Her favorite food had changed from mutton to pasta, and she choked a little when she tried to eat jerky. It tasted horrible, even though she had always liked it when she was a boy. When she had eaten as much as she wanted to, she pushed her plate aside, walked back to her room, and looked in the mirror.

She was beautiful but not strikingly so. Her hair, which had been a sandy intermediate shade between brown and blonde when she was a boy, was now a dark shade of auburn, and her eyes, which used to be brown, were now blue. Her height had changed. She was a bit shorter, but her age didn't seem to have changed, at least not by much, so she could at least hope to be taller in adulthood. Just then, the phone rang. This surprised Randy so much she almost jumped. She had been concentrating very hard on her appearance. She wouldn't say she had been vain as a boy, and she wouldn't say she was vain now, but when your appearance has recently changed...

Randy picked up the phone nervously. "Hello?"

"Er... Hi. Is this Randy?" It was Harmony's voice. Randy's heart sank.

"It used to be..." Randy replied dismally. "Is this Harmony?

"Yeah... Er... I'm really sorry, Randy."

"Could have been worse." Randy replied dryly.

"Are you okay?"

"I've been better, but, as I said, could have been worse. I suppose if I don't like it like this I can always die again and see if I come back as a bloke."

"Don't say that."

"On the plus side, I'm full time lord now, so... brain power..."

Harmony paused before saying "Seriously? That's amazing! What's 51696 divided by 17232?"

"Three," Randy responded "Is that the best you can do?"

"At that moment, yeah. I had to use a calculator."

"Harmony?"

"Yeah?"

"What happened back there?"

"Well, when you finished regenerating you were unconscious, but you seemed otherwise okay. We didn't have any trouble getting back home. Your Mum was worried sick when she saw you, your Dad just carried you inside."

Randy said nothing.

"I am sorry, really. You were right the whole time. It was stupid of me to even think about-"

Randy giggled.

"Huh?"

"It wasn't a stupid idea... Well it _was_ a stupid idea but it still had its merits. Next time though, if there is a next time, please remember the _psychic paper._"


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: School

The following Monday, Randy had to go to school again. Her father had created a new fraudulent birth certificate for her in which her name was "Randi" to avoid confusion. Randi thought this sounded a bit suspicious, but it wasn't as if anybody would suspect that she had changed gender. She ended up arriving at school early, and as a consequence, ended up seeing her friends. Harmony looked sheepish. Jenny looked a bit awkward but not much more so than usual, but Dean's mouth was open.

"Wow..." Dean murmured.

"Haven't you seen me already?" Randi muttered bitterly.

"Didn't get a close look. And your hair wasn't exactly combed..."

Randi tried to end this conversation quickly. "So I'm officially a different person now, with different parents and everything."

"Cool" Harmony said. "Fresh start. You can get a new reputation and everything."

"Right..." Randi replied. Her reputation had been pretty neutral before, so the idea of getting a new (potentially bad) one did not seem like something to celebrate.

They all walked to their respective classes. Randi still shared her first class with Harmony, but he now sat farther away from her, since she was careful to make sure she was not sitting in Randy's old seat. In every class, it was embarrassing being announced as a new student. However, Randi was indeed smarter than before, even in literary analysis which had always been her weakest subject in the past. She didn't like being faster though, because it meant spending the time she had left doing nothing. If she did things at the true speed it would take for her do them, it would look suspicious, because she was able to read entire books in under a second.

Both boys and girls looked about equally attractive, which she knew intellectually was probably the least disturbing option but it was still something to get used to. When school was over and she had arrived home, she was startled to see an extra person in the living room. The Doctor gave a small wave.

"What's he doing here?!" Randi asked in alarm.

"Is something wrong, Randi?" her father asked.

"Oh, no... I'm sorry, that was rude." Randi could not explain why, but the sight of the Doctor disconcerted her immensely. "What brings you here?"

"Trouble with the Master." the Doctor replied. Randi had assumed his arrival had had something to do with _her._

"What? I thought he was dead," Randi remarked.

"I thought that too, but history seems to say otherwise," the Doctor replied. "If you look through a history book, you'll find a few people who seem very much like the Master."

"But that's to be expected, isn't it? There have always been dictators" Randi countered.

"These aren't your ordinary dictators—not that all of them are dictators,"

"Still... How do you know it's the Master at work?"

"One of them demands an elaborate drumming ritual that fits a recognizable pattern" Randi's father remarked.

Randi wasn't sure what the significance of this was, but right now, she was more interested in how her father (or the Doctor) had figured this out. She'd heard that time lords had a certain degree of omniscience. At that moment, she tried to imagine the dictator who was demanding this drumming ritual to see if she could figure out who this man was, and the nature of the drumming pattern. However, she found she could not figure anything out this way.

"Randi?"

Randi started.

"Are you alright?" the Doctor continued.

"Er, yeah..." Randi replied awkwardly. Randi sat down on one of the chairs. The adults continued to talk, but Randi was not really paying attention. She wondered why she had no omniscience. She guessed it had something to do with not being exposed to the Time Vortex. Perhaps she should...

No...

It was mad. To expose oneself to the Time Vortex willingly was mental suicide, it could rob one completely of mental faculty. It didn't always... but it would be impossible to expose oneself anyway. Who could tell what had happened to the untempered schism when Gallifrey was destroyed? The only other possible source Randi could think of was the TARDIS heart, but looking into that tended to cause one to inhale the time vortex rather than see it (which would kill anyone who did so regardless of species). Since the untempered schism was a tear in the fabric of reality itself, perhaps the destruction of Gallifrey had left it untouched?

"That'll be it then" said the Doctor. Randi was jerked out of her reverie. He started to leave. Another figure also rose. Randi was startled to discover that it was Harmony. She hadn't realized that Harmony was there. As Harmony left, she muttered, barely audible "Come over."

Randi nodded slightly. She waited half an hour, then went to Harmony's house. The Doctor was long gone. Randi found Harmony sitting at a piano.

"You play?" Randi asked.

"I'm only just beginning—well, I had a few piano lessons when I was younger, but then I became a flautist, and never returned to the piano."

"May I hear you play?"

Harmony obliged and played a few chords of the music she was attempting to read. As far as Randi could tell, the song was very well chosen. It had a beautiful melody with widely spread whole-note chords. But Harmony did not seem to be ideal in her execution of the piece. She had to pause between every chord so that she could figure out where to put her fingers. It was clear that she was not used to playing more than one note at a time.

"May I?" Randi asked.

Harmony nodded. Randi sat down at the piano bench. She had never played piano in her entire life. Nervously, she took note of the recommended tempo, and began to play. Every chord was perfectly placed and perfectly timed. Harmony looked on enviously.

"You play?" she asked coldly.

"First time" Randi admitted.

"Is there anything you _can't_ do now?" Harmony asked in frustration.

"Sorry," Randy muttered.

"No, I'm sorry, that was out of line" Harmony replied. "So what are we going to do about the Master?"

"Didn't the adults come up with a plan?"

"They still want to wait so they gather information" Harmony replied bitterly. "I suppose that's code for 'do something about it without the kids' which makes me wonder why they would tell us about it in the first place".

"Yeah well, if there are a bunch of Masters on the-" Something suddenly occurred to Randi. "Masters? As in plural? Why would there be more than one?"

"Didn't you hear? When the Master threw himself into the Time Vortex he was split into all of his regenerations, and those regenerations spread across history.

"Oh..."

"Why didn't you hear that, we're you thinking about something else in particular?"

"What are you, a mind reader?" Randi asked in annoyance. Then she remembered that Harmony could well be _half_ a mind reader, and read... emotions or something.

"Er..." Harmony started uncertainly.

"Never mind, sorry." Randy said.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4: Mark

Randi was tired. She hadn't been getting tired all week, so she'd foolishly assumed that she no longer needed sleep. She was wrong. She now need far _less_ sleep, but she still needed sleep all the same, and after one straight week of no sleep at all she felt like she was about to collapse. She could still do schoolwork. She wasn't even sure that her fatigue was slowing her down, but she was in a rubbish mood. Randi was going over an on-demand essay when she looked up, as if about to daydream. To her surprise, she saw a boy she hadn't seen before. She wasn't sure if he was new, or she had simply failed to notice him, but it seemed very _difficult_ not to. His hair was the perfect shade of red, and his eyes were actually _green_. (Randi had never seen a ginger in real life with green eyes). His face was flawless in every other respect. She realized with some awkwardness that she was feeling an extraordinary attraction to a _boy_. But it was equally awkward to think about Harmony. She remembered harmony with a pang of... awkwardness? guilt? She still felt something for her, but Harmony probably wasn't attracted to girls anyway.

He seemed to notice her looking at him.

"Er, hello. I'm Mark."

"Hello..." The word came out of her mouth with a painfully obvious level of dreaminess. "I'm er... I'm Randi."

"Right..." he said cheerfully, and turned back to face the front of the class.

Mark's voice did nothing to allay Randi's attraction to him. His voice was smooth, like silk. Even his _accent_ was attractive. His physical manner was endlessly charismatic. A very small voice, somewhere in the back of Randi's brain (it was saying something that the voice was so small, considering how large her brain was now, said _But does he have a brain? Or personality? Something beyond basic charisma?_ The rest of the school day felt almost like the old days, before Randi had regenerated, because once again, Randi had trouble concentrating. Now however, it was far _worse _than before. If not for her new found extraordinary ability to multitask, Randi would probably fail every class if she continued to day dream about Mark every second of the day. When she got home, she tried her hardest to avoid letting her crush show on her face. She also tried her best to prevent her mind from being read. She wasn't sure that was truly possible, occlumency was only something she'd read in a Harry Potter book, so she could probably only hope that her father would respect her right to privacy. When she walked in the door to her house, her father took one look at her, and immediately looked vaguely annoyed. Randi's heart sank. "Randi if you're not too _busy_, could you meet us in the living room?" He had hardly emphasized the word "busy" but the fact that he had stung. "Right" she muttered, avoiding his eyes.

In the living room was the Doctor, Jenny's father, her father, River Song, Jenny, Harmony, and Dean. Jenny's father looked at Randi and raised one eyebrow. The Doctor also looked at Randi, but his expression did not change. "We have tracked down one of the Master's historical identity and location." the Doctor announced.

Everyone looked at him expectantly.

"King Louis XIV of France." he explained.

"The boyfriend of that woman you used to date?" River asked, amused.

"No, that was King Louis XV, and those weren't dates." Randi's father replied in irritation.

Randi found this somewhat amusing, but it didn't do much to allay her anxiety. River grinned at her, but gave no sign of detecting that something might be bothering Randi. Then River turned her attention back to the Doctor.

"So our goal is to travel to that time period and..."

"Kill him?" Randi offered, trying to be helpful. It was only after the words had escaped her mouth that she remembered that Dean was in the room. She felt horrified, but Dean displayed no reaction to her words.

"If we have to." The Doctor replied.

"Allonsy." Randi's father announced.

Randi followed the rest of the group to the TARDIS. When they arrived at their destination, they all donned period costumes (with the exception of the Doctor) and walked out of the TARDIS.

"This is the Palace of Versailles." The Doctor hissed. "Act like you belong here. We are disguised as nobles."

Randi looked around. Not many nobles actually looked comfortable being there, so Randi didn't make much effort to keep up a pretense. Luckily the pretense of Randi's friends wasn't that convincing, but the adults looked confident. As they walked Randi felt a hand land firmly on her shoulder. She nearly jumped.

"Are you all right?" the Doctor asked.

Randi was startled by the question. "Yeah..." she replied.

"It's a lot to get used to isn't it..."

"Yeah." Randi started to feel herself fighting back tears. How would _he_ know. He'd lived like this all his life.

"Well... if you need someone to talk to, I'm here."

Randi doubted that he would always be available, but she simply nodded.


End file.
